PENN STATE WRESTLING PROGRAM SHUT DOWN DUE TO ‘EXCESSIVE AWESOMENESS
University Park, PA – In a shocking move, the Penn State University administration has announced that the school’s wrestling program will be shut down, effective immediately, due to what they call “excessive awesomeness.”
According to sources, the program’s dominance on the mat, combined with its consistently high levels of excitement and entertainment, have created a situation where the university feels it can no longer contain the awesomeness.
“We’re talking about a program that has won multiple national championships, produced countless All-Americans, and has been consistently ranked as one of the top programs in the country,” said a university spokesperson. “It’s just too much awesomeness for us to handle.”
The decision has sent shockwaves through the wrestling community, with many fans and alumni expressing outrage and disappointment.
“This is a travesty,” said one fan. “The Penn State wrestling program is an institution, and to shut it down because of ‘excessive awesomeness’ is just ridiculous.”
The university has promised to provide support and resources to help the wrestlers and coaches affected by the shutdown, but for now, the future of Penn State wrestling remains uncertain.
